It’s OK to Make a Mess

I get off on messiness.

Wait, what?

Yup. Mess is great. I can root around in it, attempt to restore order. Find meaning, joy, and learn.

I love books where ordinary messes are examined. Someone feels bored, unfulfilled, and does something. Usually, the path forward isn’t clear, a required ingredient for any page turner.

To me, there’s an energy with messiness. It’s not always pleasant. It’s ambiguous; murky.

I’m happy to pull stuff out and make a mess so I can inventory and organize what’s there. Slow down, tend to, and notice.

But I think it’s important to let it be YOUR mess. Don’t feel like you need to take on societies shit. I did that. It snuck in without me really noticing. It was only when I downsized that I caught wind of it. After I rooted through drawers, closets and cupboards, I was shocked to see the full magnitude of makeup, clothes, lotion, face creams, and hair gunk.

Thousands of dollars’ worth of products I’d bought in an attempt to change myself: both how I looked and felt. And when one didn’t “work,” didn’t live up to the outlandish promise and my feverish expectation, rather than try a different route (hello, self-acceptance – it didn’t need to be the radical sort, just basic would have been a great place to start!) I bought the next new thing.

That cycle will keep you stuck, and that’s only one example.

Beliefs and mindsets; those are powerful factors too.

The best messes have come from making a big scary change. Moving to Ireland decades ago, making a huge mess in my early 20s which took a lot of time, growth, and forgiveness to clean up.

Making a mess and picking through the pieces invites self-reflection. You learn what you like. What you’re capable of. And – bonus – you get to discard things you’ve carried that were imposed upon you by someone else.

It would have never crossed my mind that there are other ways to live had I not been willing to scrap the old way and try something new.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, there’s nothing wrong with mixing it up.

A life well lived requires it.

Don’t be afraid. Just be aware: your mess is your responsibility. If you run from it, ignore it, or hope someone will come along to clean it up for you, that’s when things get tricky.